You're so nebulous sometimes
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
