I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
