Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize