Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
