ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
