We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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