They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
