Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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