Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
