the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
