Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
