yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Randomize
