Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
