Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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