Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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