Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize