I heard we made out
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
