so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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