That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
