This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
