No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
