He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
