How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
tequila makes me forget i have legs
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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