i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
