Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
