Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
