i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
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