You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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