WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
