I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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