Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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