Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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