two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
