i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
