WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
