just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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