I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
