11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Randomize
