I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
