we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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