I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize