She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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