Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize