No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
