I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize