I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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