dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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