We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
do herpes really smell.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
