yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize