He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
