We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
